ANXIETY POST - PAST EXPERIENCES - EATING

Since around year 7 at school I struggled to eat any meal of the day if I was really anxious and during secondary school that was a lot.

I struggled to eat my breakfast, I wouldn’t eat my dinner (sometimes I would eat some on the way home and on some occasions not at all) and sometimes I would struggle eating my tea.

It was worse if I was anxious and I wasn’t on my own, I even massively struggled eating at home in front of my parents and family so didn’t eat much but I really struggled around strangers.

It’s so hard to explain how being extremely anxious makes me feel when trying to eat.
The thought about eating makes me feel like I need to gip and I struggle to put any food in my mouth because if I do as soon as it touches my mouth I gip.

I used to take small bites so I could swallow then straight away to try and get around the gipping with the help of a drink.

I used to try and talk or drink to distract from the fact I wasn’t eating.
If my mind was distracted the anxiousness and feeling sick would ease so I could eat but it takes a while.

But I used to not like tea time at home when I was anxious because I knew what was going to happen and as we were all sat around the table there was no escaping it.

I would rather not eat or eat on my own than gip and make a scene in front of people including my own family.

It would also be bad if we went out for tea because I know it’s been paid for and I didn’t want to ruin the meal for everyone else.

Most of the time I would just try to avoid eating until I go home or on the way home.
If I go out for the day or travel somewhere an I’m anxious I’ll struggle to eat until I’m there or back home.

To be honest if I’m really bad with anxiety this symptom still affects to this day but only in really anxious situations which are fairly rare now a days.

Things have got slightly better though with the introduction of supplement drinks so I don’t have to eat when really bad anxiety happens but I can have a drink instead.

The more family and friends understand and don’t put pressure on you the easier it is to deal with and get around.